Planning your dream life is so much fun. Don’t limit yourself here. We are not here to listen to the voices of narcissists and bullies in our heads.
If you want, take a few deep breaths, ground yourself. Do the dream life planning when you are in a higher vibration level—i.e., when you feel really good about yourself and are grateful for your life. Do it after a good night’s sleep.
Don’t build your dream life when you are already feeling low, had a bad day, or are in a very bad mood or frustrated. You cannot create magic in such a low vibration.
Always remember, don’t gaslight yourself, doubt yourself during this planning. Most importantly, don’t limit yourself. At least give yourself permission to be whoever you want when you are dreaming. Don’t think of any judgments.
We must begin with an attitude of abundance. Imagine you are in a new city/place where nobody knows you, or all your previous relationships don’t exist. You have all the resources to start your life in this new place.
See yourself living in abundance and you will attract it. It works every time with every person.
– Bob Proctor
Let us first start with a few prompts to dig deeper into what your dream life looks like.
Try answering the following prompts:
What judgments are you scared of?
Is there any truth to those judgments/opinions, or are they gaslighting you? Are you a victim or scapegoat of narcissists? To find out, learn more about narcissism.
What negative opinions do you have of yourself?
Try to prove yourself wrong. Come up with reasons why that may not be the case. If you cannot defend it in any way, leave it. Always make sure you are not carrying other people’s projections of you.
If you feel you need to work on yourself more or you are a victim of narcissistic abuse, please seek help. Join a healing program for narcissistic abuse, therapy, or both.
Why is healing from narcissistic abuse important?
Narcissistic abuse can create a very distorted view of yourself and how you see the world. You won’t be in touch with who you are and what you want. Your entire life might have been to please these abusive people. You may never know what makes you happy.
It would be very difficult to create a dream life/goals in that state of mind. There was a point in my life where I could not even dream. I thought I was done. I had to accept my fate and move on. I thought being ambitious was very arrogant of me-there will be people waiting to remind you of the same.
If you are ready to go ahead anyway, continue with the following prompts:
What would you do in your life if there were no judgments?
What would you do in your life if you had no fear of failure?
What are the things you always wanted to do but have put off, fearing you don’t deserve it or you are dreaming too much?
What are the things you dream about quite often when you are daydreaming?
What would you want to do even if you fail?
Try to find the common desires from all these prompts above. This can give you direction in which you want to move. These prompts can give you clarity on what you are looking for in life.
Please remember, life is full of decision-making. One bad decision can ruin your entire life, but one good decision can change it for the best.
One of the best quotes on decision-making I have heard is something like
Make a decision because you really want to do it, not because you are scared there is nothing better.
Don’t make decisions out of fear, anxiety, and an attitude of scarcity. It could be statements in your head like:
- “We can never afford that.”
- “I cannot dream like that.”
- “My situation is different.”
You can read more about decision making through the links below:
https://www.lucidchart.com/blog/decision-making-process-steps
https://www.umassd.edu/media/umassdartmouth/fycm/decision_making_process.pdf
https://www.psychologytoday.com/us/basics/decision-making
https://jamesclear.com/decision-making
Thoughts become things, If you see it in your mind, you will hold it in your hand.
– Bob Proctor
If you have certain difficulties in your life, try to compensate or take another route compared to someone else to overcome that particular con. That’s why it is important not to blindly copy other people.
Also, remember not to set ego goals—goals to show others. You do not need anyone’s validation.
You can read more about goal setting through the links below:
https://www.mindtools.com/a5ykiuq/personal-goal-setting
https://jamesclear.com/goal-setting
https://positivepsychology.com/goal-setting/
https://www.mindtools.com/a5g2h6s/golden-rules-of-goal-setting
Sit down and write it down with a pen and then make up your mind you are going to do it. Don’t spend any time thinking of why you can’t. The fun is not in getting it, the fun is in growing. Goals are to help us grow, goals are to help us get. The getting is a side benefit; the growth is the real benefit.
– Bob Proctor
Coming to the fun part. Imagine you were a kid, still not corrupted by the world. Your imagination is limitless. Your possibilities are endless. See yourself as a limitless human being.
Begin building this dream life planner only if you are in the state of mind of abundance; otherwise, don’t start building now. Wait for a day until you feel better about yourself.
Planner: You can use a journal or software like PowerPoint, Canva. I personally use PowerPoint. It is easier to update or change.
1. In the first couple of slides/pages, complete the prompts given above.
2. Where do you feel like settling down, or do you prefer to lead a nomadic life?
Which country, which city – write a one-liner about why you want to live there.
Remember, there is no perfect country or city. You just weigh your options. Whatever your reason, write it down.
Do you want to travel around a bit and then decide? Write that also. Why do you want to travel around?
3. What do you want to do for a living in your dream life?
Is it one thing or multiple things?
Do you want to be an entrepreneur or work for a particular company?
How much money do you ideally want to make in a year?
If you want, you can divide them into 5-year and 10-year plans. List out why you want to do what you want to do.
4. What kind of friends/partner do you want in your dream life?
What kind of people do you want to surround yourself with? List out the non-negotiable personality traits you need in your relationships.
Also, write why these traits are important to you.
5. What is your ideal physical, mental, and emotional well-being in your dream life?
What is your ideal body weight/body fat percentage?
What mental health challenges do you face – is there any anxiety, depression, PTSD, OCD?
What are your insecurities, shame that you need to deal with? What kind of environment do you want to live and work in?
6. Write down where you stand at the moment.
Write down the things you already have to reach your dream life. Which are the areas you need to work on?
7. Create a 5-year journey plan.
Make a table with each column representing a year and write down the goals you want to achieve below that particular year.
If you want, you can break down the goals further as work, health, relationships. You can create a vision board every year for detailed goal setting.
We can build anything in our imagination. That’s where all creation begins in your life.
– Bob Proctor